The "F" Bomb

I will start this blog out stating that I am no saint. As a Christian I really do try to watch my language but sometimes a word slips out before I can stop myself. I say all that to say this; I rarely if ever curse on Facebook or in an email and I never use the F bomb in a post, tweet or email.  I gotta wonder....When did this become acceptable?  Why is it that you cannot have a conversation on ANY Facebook page without someone dropping the F bomb?  Have we become so uncivilized that we cannot respect that not everyone wants to hear or read that word?  Or is it that we just don't care. I have joined several pages on Facebook that have a lot of really good information but it never fails that someone has to drop the F bomb in the middle of a perfectly good conversation.  I just don't understand why we, as a society, cannot blog, post or tweet without someone using that word.  Is it a lack of vocabulary?  Is it a lack of respect for the feelings of others?  It is a lack of couth? (Look it up if you don't know what it means) I have to say it is very disappointing this lack of manners and respect that permeates our society today.  I wish I could say it is only men that seem to have this issue but just as many women use that word.  
So to wrap up this blog on manners lets review.  When you are asked a question you don't say "Yeah"  you say something couth like "Yes Ma'am" or "Yes Sir" "Please" and maybe even a "Thank You" would be nice. Think of who will be reading your posts and ask yourself if it will make you look uneducated.  Ask yourself before you speak.......would you kiss your mother with that mouth?  If the answer is no then maybe you shouldn't say it.   

I am not with the women marching in Washington!!

I saw the news report today about the women marching in Washington D.C. for women's rights and I am disgusted by the whole thing. Those people wearing those stupid pink hats and making their speeches, don't speak for me. First of all, what are your rights?  Is it your right to kill your baby?  Is it your right to have free birth control?  What are the "rights" you are marching for?  As far as I know killing your baby is still legal and women can get free birth control at most health units, so what is there to march for?  I find it so amazing that these women believe Donald Trump has the power to take these "rights" away.  He is just one man, not a king, not a dictator, just the president.  He DOES NOT have the power or authority to take rights away.  I also find it amazing that women don't want the government involved in their reproductive rights but they expect the American people to pay for their birth control and/or abortion.  When did it become my responsibility to pay for your sex life?  When did it become my responsibility to pay for your bad choices?  I find it totally insulting that, because I am a woman, I am incapable of taking care of myself and I need the government to pay for my choice to have sex. You can't have it both ways, either you want the government out of your sex life or you take responsibility and pay for your own birth control.  And another question....why do you even need to have an abortion? Did you not learn what causes pregnancy and how to prevent it?  When I hear of women having multiple abortions I think "WHAT THE HELL!!"  are you that stupid that you can't go to a clinic and get some pills?  They even make IUD's that last for up to 10 years!  As far as I am concerned any woman who gets pregnant on "accident" is full of it.  You know when you have unprotected sex there is a chance you can get pregnant so don't tell me you didn't know, sex education is taught in just about every public school in this country.  
Although I am pro-life I don't believe making abortion illegal is the answer.  We, as a country, have a heart problem.  Pro-choice people don't believe in the sanctity of life, they don't believe life starts at conception and they don't think the life they are killing is a baby or maybe they just don't care.  We need to change the narrative to "all lives matter!" Not black lives, white lives, old lives, young lives but ALL lives and that includes unborn lives.  When we stopped thinking of a fetus (Latin for "offspring") as an actual human life we became almost inhuman ourselves. 

Pugsly

I lost my Pugsly on Monday, January 9, 2017.  He was 14 years old.  I had his mom and dad, Rocky and Adrian.  They were cool little dogs that I had to give away when we got orders to Japan.  Pugsly originally belonged to my daughter and granddaughter.  Adrian had a litter and Jessica wanted one to grow up with Destiny.  He was a super cute puppy but all pugs puppies are cute.  When I came back from Japan he was living out with her dad so I decided he was coming home with me.  I remember he was really skinny and was positive for heart worms but that didn't matter he was my dog now.  I took him to the vet and had the heart worms cleared up and had him neutered and he quickly got to be a round dog.  What a funny boy he was, always happy to see me no matter how long I was away.  He didn't like to be held but loved to be loved on as long as you didn't mess with his tail or his wrinkles.  He would bark at nothing and dance around when it was dinner time.  He was a very happy dog.  He started having seizures several years ago but the vet said they were fairly normal so we didn't worry until the Friday before he died.  He started the day having a couple but by the evening he was having them back to back.  It wasn't looking good for him so Friday night I took him to the vet who ran tests and gave him some medication to stop the seizures but it didn't work.....nothing worked.  By Sunday he couldn't move at all.  I held him on my lap playing with his tail and cleaning his wrinkles.  I knew when he didn't respond to either he was gone.  I held him and told him what a great dog he had been and then found him a cool comfortable spot to rest.  I knew if he made it through the night on Sunday I would have to take him to the vet to be put to sleep but I prayed that I wouldn't have to do that.  I loved that little dog and did not want to have to make that decision so he made it for me.  He was gone by Monday morning when I got up. Jon came home early and we buried him in the little memorial garden I am building for Mom and Dad, under the bird feeders.  He loved to bark at the birds flying overhead so I thought it was a perfect resting place. 
Once again I am mourning.  Once again my heart is breaking and I am overwhelmed with sadness. I know I should be thankful for the years I had with him.  I know he lived a very long life and was well loved but that doesn't ease my broken heart.  Once again the phrase "this too shall pass" runs through my head and I know I will get past this sadness but WOW!!  I am thankful that my last 3 dogs are fairly young and in good health.  I am thankful for a husband who puts up with my dogs when he isn't even a dog person.  I know I will get another puppy but for now I will mourn my "Old Man" and remember what a great dog he was.  
  

By the edge of a woods, at the foot of a hill,

Is a lush, green meadow where time stands still.

Where the friends of man and woman do run,

When their time on earth is over and done.

For here, between this world and the next,

Is a place where each beloved creature finds rest.

On this golden land, they wait and they play,

Till the Rainbow Bridge they cross over one day.

No more do they suffer, in pain or in sadness,

For here they are whole, their lives filled with gladness.

Their limbs are restored, their health renewed,

Their bodies have healed, with strength imbued.

They romp through the grass, without even a care,

Until one day they start, and sniff at the air.

All ears prick forward, eyes dart front and back,

Then all of a sudden, one breaks from the pack.

For just at that instant, their eyes have met;

Together again, both person and pet.

So they run to each other, these friends from long past,

The time of their parting is over at last.

The sadness they felt while they were apart,

Has turned into joy once more in each heart.

They embrace with a love that will last forever,

And then, side-by-side, they cross over… together.

Why do some get their miracle from God and others don't?

I just finished watching Miracles from Heaven.  It was such a wonderful movie.  If you haven't seen it the movie is about a little girl from Texas who has a disease that causes her intestines to not digest food. Her mom gets her an appointment with a doctor at Boston Children's Hospital who is an authority her condition but he doesn't give the family any hope.   There is no cure for it only experimental treatments.  She continues to get sicker and sicker with no hope for the future. She tells her mom she is ready to die because she is in so much pain and knows she isn't going to get better.  Once home she climbs an old hollowed out tree with her sister and falls down the middle of it. She is knocked out and it takes the fire department over 3 hours to get her out. Because the tree is completely hollow they can't cut the it down for fear it will collapse and crush her.  For whatever reason the fall healed her. She came out of the fall with only a few cuts and scrapes and her digestive system just started working again.  She told her parents she talked to God and told him she didn't want to go back but He told her she needed to and that she would be okay.  
I tell you all this with the big question "Why did her miracle get answered?"  When Dad was in the hospital he had so many people praying for him.  We all prayed for a miracle, that he would be healed and come home but that didn't happen. I remember sitting by his bed talking to him and praying over him.  I remember Royette doing the same as well as the pastor from their church.  I know everyone at her church was praying the same thing, that he would recover from the complications from surgery.  So why didn't God grant us our miracle?  I wish I knew the answer to that. I wish I could understand God's plan for us and what we are suppose to learn from Dad's passing.  We hear, when there is a death in the family or someone is injured, that God is in control and has a plan for everything.....WOW is that hard to grasp. As I sit here typing this blog on Christmas eve I keep thinking about the miracle that is Jesus Christ. God gave us his only Son as a sacrifice for our sins.  I know that should comfort me. I know my dad is in heaven and that he isn't feeling any more pain or sadness but that doesn't make me miss him any less.  I still get angry. Angry at the doctors thinking they missed something.  Angry at myself for maybe not praying enough.  Anger and sadness that I won't ever talk to him again.  Angry at God that we didn't get our miracle.  

It's Christmas Eve Eve

I am sitting here listening to talk radio and Aurorra is in the living room wrapping presents she bought with her Christmas money.  She is such a giver. She took HER money she got as a gift and used it to buy gifts.  What a blessing she is.  Jon and Tristan are off doing their guy things.  I know they stopped at the gun store and they probably will end up at Tractor Supply before the day is done and I'm sure they will find something completely unhealthy to eat for lunch since that is what guys do.  I know Tristan loves spending time with Jon. I think it is good for him to spend time with men who will set an example of what it is to be a gentleman.  
I am praying everyone is able to spend time with the ones they love and remember the ones we have lost.  I pray you all will give thanks for the blessings in your lives and remember why we celebrate this season.  We were all given the biggest gift. The gift of Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior.  The gift of a baby who grew to be the savior of the world . The gift of eternal life is ours for the asking if we believe in Him.
Merry Christmas!!

What causes a bully to be a bully?

Our grand kids lived with my husband and I for 8 years.  We didn't intend to keep them that long but it just worked out that way.  I knew early on that 2 of them, Aurorra and Tristan, were different.  Aurorra was always a little quirky and Tristan was always like a bull in a china shop.  He would just do whatever he wanted and didn't think of the consequences.  He was kicked out of a mother's day out program when he was 2 because the teacher just couldn't handle this energetic little boy that never seemed to sit still and was always into something. We decided to home school them when Arkansas implemented common core. I had read a lot about it and knew I didn't want the kids in a school that taught common core studies.  Another reason we decided to home school was Tristan. He was in kindergarten by then and always in trouble. He was bored and just couldn't seem to sit still for long.  We took him to the doctor and got the usual prescription for ADHD medication.  It did help him in school only because it zoned him out and he didn't have any desire to cause trouble.  I hated it because he just wasn't our Tristan when he was on it.  Now Tristan is all boy but the medicine made him more like a zombie......I hated it.  We home schooled for 3 years and then they went back to live with their mother and that meant they would be back in public school.  I knew Tristan would have a hard time adapting because he has always been a creature of habit and doesn't like change but I thought Destiny and Aurorra would be okay.  They both did fine when we lived in Arkansas and I thought that would continue in Louisiana. I was not surprised that Destiny thrived in school.  She has always been very competitive and loves to be the head of her class and all the praise that goes along with that.  I was surprised at how bad Tristan and Aurorra have been bullied.  Now I know Aurorra is quirky but she is quite the social butterfly so I thought she would fine her niche....she didn't.  Middle school is terrible especially if you are a little different.  The kids have been ruthless to the both of them and what is even more sad is the lack of empathy from the teachers and faculty at the school.  So why are they bullied?   What makes a child or young adult think this is acceptable behavior?  Does it start in the home? I always told the kids if I EVER found out they bullied or picked on anyone life for them would become very difficult. I guess parents don't do the same with their kids.  I think it is so sad that these 2 kids, and I am sure dozens more, hate going to school everyday because they know when they get there they will be picked on, insulted, and tormented the entire day.  I think it is sad that you have kids in middle school committing suicide because they just can't take the bullying anymore and what is even sadder is the parents of the bullies don't seem to teach their children that it is wrong to pick on or bully someone just because they are a little different or don't fit in how you think they should.  God made us all different, that is what makes us great.  How boring would life be if we were all the same?  Being unique or quirky shouldn't be seen as a reason to pick on ANYONE. I know Tristan and Aurorra just want to be accepted for who they are.  They are amazing kids who just want to be liked, they want to have friends and do the things kids their ages do.  Bullies make that almost impossible. Most days I just want them to come back home so I can teach them here and protect them from the jerks and bullies of the world but I don't know if that is the answer. Will cause more harm than good? Maybe for just a couple more years until they are old enough to understand the hatefulness that is in the world and be able to stand up for themselves. Their mom is doing an amazing job and everything possible to protect them but she can't be at the school all the time.  She can't be there to stop them from being bullied and she can't count on the school to step in and stop the bullying from happening.  So what is the solution?  I wish I knew but I am afraid of what could happen if they get pushed too far. Please pray for the Tristans and Aurorras of the world. Pray that they are able to ignore the ugliness that is around them and concentrate on their studies. Pray for the bullies of the world that they would open their eyes to the damage they are causing with their behavior.  Pray for the parents of the bullies that they would see the damage their children are doing to other children.  Pray for the parents of the bullied that they can make their children understand that there is ugliness in the world but they are special and loved.  

http://www.bullyingstatistics.org/content/facts-on-bullying.html

How do we cope with the loss of a loved one?

It has been a tough year and a half for our family.  My dad died on August 21, 2015, my mom died on June 19, 2016 on Father's Day.  Jon's grandmother died on November, 27, 2016 and my boxer Chloe died today, November 28, 2016.  Now I know there are those that would say I shouldn't include my dog in with family members but I would have to disagree with them.  She was very much a part of our family, she had been my dog for 11+ years so life will be very different without her around.  

As I mourned the loss of my Chloe this morning it kind of hit me how much loss we have had to deal with in such a short period of time.  To say it has been difficult would be an understatement.  How does one learn to live without their beloved family member?  How much loss can a person or family take?  I wish I had an answer for that question. Today I feel completely overwhelmed with grief and sorrow.  It just seems to wash over me and I can hardly catch my breath.  My head hurts from crying and all I want to do is curl up in bed and forget everything.  Unfortunately I don't have that luxury.  The animals are not going to feed themselves and someone has to milk the goats so that is out of the question.  Life goes on at least that is what I am told.  I guess I will have to learn to cope somehow, it won't be easy but then again the last year and 4 months have been anything but easy. I thought I had made progress after Mom and Dad died but losing Chloe today seems to have set me back quite a bit. I feel like I am starting over again with the feelings of loss and grief, of sorrow and sadness.  I knew I was going to lose Chloe soon, her health had declined pretty rapidly in the last few months.  The best estimate of her age was 13 to 14 years so she was quite old for a boxer. She lived a very long life but I don't think you really ever get "ready" to lose someone or something you love.  Even though I knew her life was going to come to an end soon I was still devastated when she died this morning.  The saying "this too shall pass" keeps running through my mind. I know I will be sad for a while but life does go on.  There are animals to feed and gardens to grow and life will go on but it sure won't be the same.  It hasn't been the same since Mom and Dad died but I have learned to adapt to a new normal and I know I will do the same for Chloe.   

  For my Chloe 

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

So much hate and ugliness in the world....why?

     I saw a video on Facebook last night. It was a few guys in a boat on a lake or river who came upon a dog that someone dumped.  The dog was sitting along the bank tangled in some roots.  He had tape wrapped around his muzzle and the back of his head. The guys were able to get the dog in the boat and cut the tape off his muzzle.  The poor baby was cold and weak from not eating.  God only knows how long the dog had been there before he was found by those good samaritans who saved it. Now why would someone do something like that to a defenseless dog?  Why would anyone think that is acceptable?  I have such a hard time understand the evil and ugliness that is in our world today. Last week I heard of a woman who was saved that was found chained up like a dog in a shipping container in North Carolina.  She had been in that container for 2 months.  They believe her boyfriend was killed and buried on the property.  The guy that owned the property was a registered sex offender and probably a serial killer. They believe there are at least 4 others buried on the property.  
     Now I know there has always been evil in the world but the question I have is this;  is there more evil in the world now or is it that the evil is the same but we are able to hear about it more because of the internet?  We all learned about Hitler, Stalin and Pol Pot in high school history but were they the exceptions or were they just an example of our inhumanity?  Are people inherently evil and fight daily to keep it in check or are these just examples of "bad" people?      
     Before I became a Christian I thought Christians were weak.  I wondered why people had to believe in a higher power to be good.  Why do we need God to teach us right from wrong?  I knew right from wrong when I wasn't a Christian.  I knew stealing was wrong,  murder was evil and lying was bad.  Maybe it was just ingrained in me from church when I was little.  I guess there are those in this world who really struggle with this issue and rely on God to keep the on the straight path.  Only God knows the answer.            
     As for me I will continue to believe that God is good, that He is in control, that his word is powerful and we should follow it.   I will try to look at people through his eyes and always look for the best in them.  
        

You should plant a garden

I love to garden.  I love growing my own food.  I love digging in the dirt and getting my hands dirty.  I don't love the backache that comes with it but I have learned to deal with it.  Working in the garden is very gratifying.  What other activity can you do that gives you a return of fresh vegetables for your trouble?  What other activity connects you with the earth more than growing your own vegetables?  None that I can think of.  Watching my broccoli and cauliflower grow, anticipating the harvest and how good it will taste makes me happy. Oh well it's the little things in life that make life worth living.......wow that was deep!

We made it through another election

I was so disappointed that Ted Cruz didn't get the nomination and I swore I would not vote for Trump. Well I had to eat crow yesterday because that is what I did.  I literally had tears in my eyes as I pressed the "cast ballot" button on the machine.  It was sad to see those names on the ballot when we had so many good choices in the beginning and ended up with Trump, Clinton, and Johnson. 
Never in my adult life or have I felt so much dread over an election. As I stayed up late looking at the returns on the internet. I was shocked to see Trump win state after state.  I was so convinced that Clinton was going to be our next president and that just filled me with fear and sadness.  Now I am still fearful for my country but  I also have just a tiny bit of hope. How wonderful is it that so many people actually got out and voted yesterday!  I added up just the top 5 and it was close to 125 million votes and that is astounding. It is amazing and sad at the same time that it took the fear of Clinton becoming president to get that many evangelicals out to vote or maybe it is because Trump was the nominee on the right and that is still sad that they put so much faith in someone who is so flawed. Maybe it is about redemption,  is it the hope that a man like Trump might be a good president?  It is hard to say what caused so many to get out and vote yesterday but I am thankful they did.   
Trump has a clean slate and I will be praying that he does the right things for our country.  I hope and pray that he nominates a godly person to fill the vacant supreme court seat like he promised and the others that are expected to become vacant in the next few years.  I hope he follows through on his promise to secure our borders, to keep Americans safe and to help create and economy that will encourage companies to bring back manufacturing from overseas.  I hope and pray that he sticks to his word when he says he is the president of everyone and doesn't use his position to punish those who spoke out against him or didn't support him.  I pray he is the president so many hope he will be.  
God Bless America and God Bless our new president. 
  

This holiday season

Last year was the first holiday season without Dad and it was pretty hard on all of us.  I bought a juniper bush for a Christmas tree and planted it in the back yard.  I really didn't want to even do that but we did have the kids here part of the time and I didn't want to deprive them of a tree. We have lost Mom since last Christmas so this year will be doubly bittersweet.  Now that it is almost that time of year again I have decided to celebrate the holiday season like Mom and Dad are still here. I know they wouldn't want us moping around and I refuse to do that again this year.  I am hoping the rest of the family will do the same.  I am also hoping we will be able to have our annual Christmas get-together here at the house this year.  I want to make all the stuff Mom and Dad would have liked with LOTS of desserts.  I want to celebrate the birth of our Lord with family, reminisce about past holidays and make new memories. I want to celebrate life like I know they would want us to do.  This is an invitation to the whole family to come on out to our house in East Texas and lets spend some time together.  Lets share stories and eat some yummies and have a good time.